Sunday, July 23, 2006

Letter dated 23rd July

Years down the line, when we are older with families, we can look back and well....will always have one kind of secret smile for you
but wont be the one i have had in the past...that one is borne of love received from another person, the kind that can never be replicated or forced, the one that comes without realizing, that smile is special and only one person at a time can bring that in me....but i will have another secret smile for you, one that will remind me of when i was young and in love for the first time....the kind of smile happy memories, but memories nonetheless can inspire

This is after I spoke with A and she was in M-Block in Delhi with the more compatible guy....just an excerpt
But as petty as this is, I hope he doesn't make her as happy as she was with me. Look ladies, if you think guys are bastards then reserve judgement before reading this. I have had so many women ask what guys want and how guys thing. But the problem is all of you....okay fine, most of you have already passed judgement and that isn't becoming nor fair. So fine, if you want to know how a guy lives and thinks, read this.

Yes, I am heartbroken and yes, I have cried in her arms. It burns inside to see her with this guy in my head, them holding hands or going to the Body Shop, a place where I used to go to buy her things on the way back to Delhi. And its very bitterness and pain and revulsion that will drive me to do stupid, shallow things that will , for the moment, make me feel better about myself, will make me feel like someone is attracted to me. So if you must judge, remember that there is an unsaid pain enchoing in my heart and my head every second of every day, in even quiet moment stolen in this city or any other in the world

No comments: