Saturday, August 27, 2011

Oh of being able to find the time to do this

Things I Didn't Think I Would Appreciate But I Did After the Process:

-- a long shower where you stand long enough that you appreciate the feeling
-- walk past a bookstore, stop and browse
-- sit on a bench for a c
-- sit with a cigar, listening to music while reading something non-work/finance related
-- listening to non-favorite songs because heck, I have the time to really listen to the song and not just have something definitely good in the background for the time I can focus on it but not long enough time to find a new song
-- clean up my computer. And realize why I am a little possessive of it. Because it's my think-space, almost like a residual storage that well, is just my own library with everything the way I like it and a relatively tangible source of knowledge that it will be the way I left it. Which also explains why I get upset when it doesn't work. It's losing a library of stuff that was important enough for me to file
-- thinking about this stuff
-- while packing, listening to chura liya hai, one of the seventeen hindi songs I have and not just because I do like it a little; it's because it reminds me of Saudi and being a kid and dad's beard when he had it
-- while packing, the sight of my things, books mostly, in a cardboard box reminds me of living in Pachshila Park as a kid, my things from Saudi in boxes in the garage and having to wait a while for someone to open the garage for me to get to them
-- of calling up a friend just to speak about nothing in particular
-- of not having this giant preoccupying gorilla-thought in my head when I'm hanging with her
-- of being able to breather deeper than I did, odd yes but that's the visual form of the emotion
But really of finding the time to convert a strong desire to remember this feeling into words

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